Shivering in a Perfect Warm Arizona Winter

Today’s temp was 70 degrees. Tonight’s low: 40.

Ditto tomorrow’s forecast. (21.1 C. high, 4.4 low)

It’s picture-perfect conditions here in Phoenix, Arizona, dry, warm stunning blue skies.

There’s no denying these pleasant comfortable conditions — best of the year and oh so very attractive to snowbirds from around the northern continent — including you, Canada!

Best time of year to be in southern Arizona

January 5th and it’s a bright 70 degrees (21 C)! That’s just fucking wrong!

While I could justifiably gloat “read it and weep” to much of the country shivering in snow and below-freezing temps, I don’t.

Why? ‘Cause while I can’t deny its pleasantness, I don’t like this weather!

Dead of winter. I should have traded in my flip-flops for socks and New Balance sports shoes by now!

Should be wearing a heavy coat rather than lightweight sweatshirt jacket — or simply a flannel shirt.

Should have my tiny studio sealed up with a heater running rather than windows wide open at 7:15 at night!

I should be sitting here with at least warming slippers rather than bare-footed, for god’s sake!

Yes, both my natural earthiness and Nordic genes sound alarms about this gross unnaturalness of a winter that elsewhere mirrors late-spring to early-summer.

It’s more than that.

A day’s 70 degrees in early January warns ferociously and undeniably of what’s to come:

The Brutalizing Bones-Cracking Bake-Off.

Which in Phoenix begins begins in early June — with official entry into the Triple Digits — (100 F, 37.7 C) followed by steady ascents into 115-120 degrees (46.1-48.8) C.)  through July/August — then a snail’s-paced descent back to 100 (37.7 C) in late September.

That’s four solid months of unforgiving blazing dry summer heat, guys. Would YOU like to live in that!? You’re invited to take my seat. Take it, please!

That question’s almost impossible to answer since most folks have no concept of extreme desert heat. Reading the numbers and experiencing them are entirely different animals.

So yeah, 70 degrees (21.1 C) sounds great ‘n’ all.

And to all you reeling in snow and ice and frigid temps, I feel ya.

I do. I’ve lived that too.

I’ve lived in about every sort of climate short of the EXTREMES far north and south of the equator.

I’ve done my time, paid my dues.

I wouldn’t exchange a fine Phoenix winter — as UNREAL and unnatural it feel — for shoveling snow, sliding across ice, a zillion car accidents and STUPID drivers, high heating bills and all the rest that spells winter.

I can only accept — this once — these mighty pleasant conditions as a well-deserved and just reward for having suffered through and survived but barely the long GOD-AWFUL heat and painfully dry 2019 summer.

Tomorrow’s forecast: 70 high, 40 low (21/5 C)  … then late week we slide to a “chilly” 61 high, 36 low (16/2 C).

Again, no “read ’em ‘n’ weep!” gloating from this quarter!

I envy ye with genuine winters, to a point.

But I do sit here shivering … not in coldness but in fear and trepidation of the abhorrent heat ahead.

Seems that shivering is as much a winter as I’ll ever enjoy in Phoenix, Arizona.