Making good with my modem

You’ve not seen the light ’til you’ve had this modem.

Got this Motorola modem when I moved into my little studio in February.

It’s been in two spots as things morph in my new space. Where it can be placed is limited as there are only two cable outlets.

In actuality, the modem can go only around the patio door/kitchen — as Cox cable informed me that that yeah, they can activate the second outlet (thereby affording me more options)  … for some $60 and a visit from a tech! GRRRRR! No f-ing way!

So near the patio door / kitchen the modem remains.

This modem’s been driving me bonkers! Here’s why.


them’s one holey Motorola mother!

Holey-moley! Lookit them thar holes!

Bright blue light POURS forth like water through, well, fittingly, a sieve.  You can’t tell from that pic but believe me, at night, looks like half a police car in here!


This modem’s mucked up my sleep BIG TIME.

I’ve shrouded the darn thing every night — a fine line since it really needs ventilation, this thing operates hot — then every morning removed coverings to avoid overheating.

Pain in the ass and STILL the blue light bled through.

Then the other day, I was in the kitchen, unofficially meditating on my modem, and inspiration struck.

The cupboard above the fridge!

The modem, router, surge protector, wires … the whole unslightly shebang could go there!

Plus it’d be protected. Never liked electronics by the screened patio door with the Arizona winds, dirt, dust and most of all gusty monsoons in summer.



What’s behind cupboard number 1?


Electronics get a private suite

Not so high speed.

Those two thick cords make it impossible to close the cupboard door.  It’s ajar about 2 inches (5 cm) along three sides.

I went to bed all optimistic about problem solved and promised sleep.

Not so high speed.

As I drifted off, sorta, I was disturbed by something all aglow in the kitchen. As if a UFO was hovering.

I turned my head, focused my bleary vision.

It’s the damn modem!!!

Blue light seeping through the narrow gaps and flooding a quarter of my kitchen!


So in those wee hours I pulled out the step stool and McGyvered a light barrier  — a dishtowel.

A Band-Aid solution.

Today comes a blackout curtain for the electronics suite. Probably cardboard, cut to size, covered with blackout fabric to go inside the cupboard.

More than two months it’s been, my modem ‘n’ I duking this out. We have got to make good.

Don’t misunderstand. It’s a fine device that delivers the Internet into my little studio.

But the amount of blue light is UN-REAL.

Even a UFO is more subtle.

Perhaps when I’m done with this holey modem, I’ll set it outside, still plugged in, to signal a landing strip for aircraft.

Or aliens. Whichever.