The Sunday Post (6 Days Before Moving)

It’s happening.

In all probability. Always a chance something could go awry at the last minute.

However, as of now, odds are in my favor. I meet tomorrow with K., private owner-landlord of the mobile home park, to sign the lease on the rental number 7.

Only then will it become official.

Thereafter I advance to GO. Taking care of multiple address changes, arranging utilities services, cable transfer, etc. and etc. All those tasks that make moving soooooo fun and stress-free. NOT! 🙂

Lately my free time’s gone to disassembling my current space. Removing pictures from walls, patching nailholes and pinholes from pushpins with a product that got rave reviews online — justifiably so. (Forget the name; will post anon.)

Moreover, I’m also painting over every patch and pinhole, either with a foam brush or a Q-tip.

This after collecting many paint chips from multiple stores and setting them against the walls in different conditions — i.e., daylight, evening light — to ascertain an E-X-A-C-T match. Not only in shade but in sheen.

Then after narrowing it down to a few tops candidates, I followed a suggestion read online:

Unscrew the faceplate on an electrical outlet. With a razor or pocket knife, verrrrry carefully shave off a sample of paint. Reattach the faceplate.

Then I bagged the actual paint samples in tiny plastic bags labeled accordingly (living room, bedroom) and took them to Home Depot for a final opinion/analysis by the paint person.

Not on the shade (Light Navajo, according to my meticulously discerning eye) but the sheen. We both agreed: eggshell.

She concocted my shade in a sample-size can, the smallest available. (Since I’m patching only tiny holes, I need not even 1/4 cup!)

I verrrry meticulously applied the paint to a push-pin hole in the kitchen pantry — an inconspicuous spot chosen in case the paint wasn’t a perfect match.

Waited for it to dry.


Thereafter, I proceeded to EVERY SINGLE pinhole and nail hole — many of them not even mine! — as well as ANY painted spot throughout the apartment, including normal wear and tear, i.e., along the window edge sill for one reason:

My property management company are pricks who’ll concoct reasons to withhold the deposit.

Natural detective that I am, if I think like the criminal and stay one step ahead, they can’t nail me.

No pun intended!

{Yes, for double protection, I’m taking photos before the final walk-through too.}

Sure, I’d leave the place meticulous and in ***far better condition than I found it*** regardless. Example: I shoulda photograph all the dead flies in the sills upon moving in.

That said, I have reason to go the extra 100 miles to avert the meanness and the Greed with a capital G that have given my property management company a bad name. A REALLY BAD NAME.

One stars across the board on Yelp and nearly every one talking about how the company screwed them royally outta their deposits.

Forewarned is forearmed.

Fortunately, as the Master of Meticulous (to a fault, some would say), attention to minute details comes naturally.

It’s a genuine asset as I prepare not only to depart and leave EVERY SURFACE of the place immaculate but to encounter the Beast of Greed.

Everything’s in mint condition apartment-wise.

Every possession and paper’s been gone through with a fine-tooth comb and either discarded, recycled or donated.

Most possessions are, as of today, tidily arranged in boxes neatly set against one wall, ready for Moving Day on Saturday.

I’ve cleaned all windows, inside and outside.

I’ve moved the refrigerator and stove and on their backsides cleaned off any bit of dirt or dust; I do that regularly anyhow so no biggie.

I’ve removed the stove’s electric coils, scrubbed & shined their catch-bowls AND INTO the stovetop’s innards themselves.

Think of any and every surface in an apartment and I’ve cleaned it to the cleanest condition it can get!

Baseboards. Tops of baseboards. Deep into every crevice and corner in cupboards and drawers and along every floor.

I did them all when I moved in. Did them again while living there. And am doing them again upon leaving.

Meticulously.NO stone left unturned!

And still.

And still I keep scanning for something, ANYTHING that I’ve not touched that my landlord could possibly ding me on. I’ve even repaired a few small holes in the ceiling left by prior tenants so I don’t get fined by Things I Did Not Do!

Even the carpet looks great! Reason: I don’t wear shoes in the house.

After I go, the “cleaning crew” (who did such a shit job before I moved in) will have nothing to do. Literally. Have. Nothing. To Do.

They’ll do it anyway. Because that’s what they’re paid for — and at a far better wage than mine I might add!

But that’s neither here nor there.

Here is: The Long Goodbye to My Current Abode.

The There is: My New Space that Officially Becomes Mine Tomorrow.

Y. E. Y!