The Regal Cockroach …

Think like the bad guy.

Any good cop and investigator’ll tell you that. Thinking like the bad guys levels the playing field or — better still — puts you one step ahead.

My street smarts plus robust distrust of people plus extending trust only when it is earned serve me well in daily living. At 59, can’t think of a single case of anyone pulling the wool over my eyes, though once an intimate other inched close.

Think like the bad guys.

My adeptness notwithstanding, an email today made me realize there’s one set of bad guys I can’t wrap my mind around:

Scammers.

In general and specifically craigslist. Or as I call it: craigshitlist.

Today this email arrived in response to … actually, I don’t know what in hell in response to! The header read: Cleaners Needed ($18-$20/Hour)

Dear Applicant,

Are you available for a local interview tomorrow morning or in the afternoon?

Please email me back with your best available time. I hope this email finds you in good health and spirit. My name is Elisha Murphy and I’m a Senior Job Recruiter at Online Jobs Farm trying to fill positions in your area. The reason I’m emailing you is because you expressed interest in a position we offered through Craig’sList few days ago and I reviewed your resume and I would very much like to work with you. You can see the details of the position below:

Cleaners Needed ($18-$20/Hour)

We’re looking for high quality independent cleaning professionals and managers who:
*Have existing cleaning experience
* Take pride in and are dedicated to their work
* Have high standards of cleanliness

Requirements:
* Good attitude
* Punctual/Reliable
* Must speak English
* Must have prior cleaning / housekeeper experience

$18-$20/Hour plus benefits include: Health insurance, paid holidays, vacation and sick leave.

We appreciate your interest in the available position. Our human resources staff is now reviewing applications and expect to schedule interviews starting from tomorrow. In order to schedule your interview you have to register yourself on our website after that you’ll see details of available position and location of the interview inside your account.

Please visit www.Onlinejobsfarm.com and fill out your application so we can process your info and schedule your interview

We apologize in advance, but due to the high volume of resumes we receive, we only respond to those candidates who register atwww.Onlinejobsfarm.com. Once you’ve completed your registration, we will set a time for an interview. If tomorrow is inconvenient, you can reschedule it at our website after completing your registartion

Looking forward to meeting you.

Regards,

Elisha Murphy

Senior Job Recruiter

Online Jobs Farm
Email: Hr@OnlineJobsFarm.com

Web: www.Onlinejobsfarm.com

+ + +

Congrats if you got through that entire POS! I quit after the first sentence!

And to your question,”Elisha”: NO I AM NOT AVAILABLE FOR AN INTERVIEW TOMORROW MORNING OR AFTERNOON OR ANY TIME FROM NOW INTO ETERNITY!

Motherfucker.

Scammers are bottom-feeders. They’re worse than cockroaches. In their maliciousness, they concoct all modes and means to scam others out of money, their identities, etc. etc.

I’m a bright gal. Imaginative. Worldly-wise. I can wrap my mind around SO many things. Stretch to understand so very much in life. Stuff distasteful, nefarious, harmful. I can even understand a LOT of the criminal mind.

Except for these scamming scumbags.

I do my small part by posting warnings and flagging. I’m thoughtful that way, I suppose. Not that it does a whit of good.

Plus in this case, the header alone screeched SCAM! Mine is a town of minimum-wage jobs. NO CLEANER MAKES $18-20 here!!

Still, some naive trusting people will reply. One or more might even reveal that all-important Social Security number to these dirtbags.

If I could douse “Elisha Murphy, Senior Job Recruiter” and every one of “her” motherfucking ilk with Raid roach spray, I would.

They’re despicable diseased Creatures of the Cesspool. Whose ways and thoughts I shall not understand.

They make the cockroach look positively regal.

Advertisement

No Love Lost with Lori

Craigslist never fails to deliver.

When that delivery’s crap, shit and spam … hence the craigshitlist that I call it.

I have in my in-box no fewer than three emailed responses from job queries over the past day or so that reek of BS and low-life spam to the high heavens. This one’s my “favorite.”

“Dear {my name}:

Your resume looked the leading of all that we obtained. From what we have seen out of your resume you should be precisely the type of staff member we have been interested in!

Early today my management informed me that I am not permitted to to post the job on craigs list so we will have to hire through site called Career Search. For this reason, I’m requesting you apply by using their web site instead of craigs list.

If you’re looking to set up an interview you’ll need to download and install the application soft ware at Career Search.

Please make sure to down load the application soft ware Here

Once you have installed the soft ware don’t forget to search for listing id: 1503 and submit an application.

Don’t forget to e mail me back when you have applied and then we can setup the interview date.

Thank you,
Lori Summers
HR Manager”

Why my fav? Aside from the shameless transparency of “my manager informs me that I can’t post on craigslist,” that is?

Because in spite of the opening line: “Your resume looked the leading of all that we obtained,” fact is: I DID NOT SEND A RESUME!!

Pret-ty damn amusing and pret-ty damn transparent, this spammer.

Of course those aren’t the sole spam markers. “Please be sure to down load (sic) the application soft ware (sic) Here (sic).”

Yes. I will surely do that! I will be sure to download the MALWARE that you’re covertly handing out.

Immediately after I’ve installed your malware, I’ll certainly hasten to search for listing 1503 and submit an application. Your application that will promise to instruct me to submit personal information, private information, so that you can steal my identity under the guise that “we need this information to move forward with your application from the ideal candidate who is YOU!”

And while you’re thieving away, I’ll not overlook your instructions to click on the provided link to allow you to conduct the credit check that “is necessary” because “I am the ideal candidate.” After all, what’s prying into my most private records if YOU need it to complete my job application?

You certainly don’t want any LOW lifes working for you! You wouldn’t want people who are untrustworthy, unreliable and dishonest on your payrolls.

And you most certainly wouldn’t want scummy rotten-to-the-core asshole misleading liars on your staff! Why, think about the competition such staff members would bring you!!

So, dear “Lori Summers,” while I’m so very pleased that you took the time to send me your lying-through-your-teeth email and made that effort to pull the wool over my eyes to obtain personal information for your own evil and self-serving purposes, I have to pass.

Because here’s the thing “Lori Summers.” I have morals and integrity and honesty and good intentions. You don’t. We’re just not a good fit.

Good luck in your future.

Craigslist gives it up for the cockroaches of life.

What’s up with craigslist?

Craigshitlist I mean.

I wonder whether the powers that be are aware of just how awful they’ve become.

How their job sections have been overtaken by the virulent virus of spammers. How their personal ads have become cesspools of people up to no good, indeed a very conservative way of putting it. Trolls.

I wonder whether they’re aware that the creepy and the crappy outweighs the considerate and the helpful.

Is it that they’re unaware? Or they just don’t care?

Either way, it’s a crime. Long, long ago, craigslist was a novel creation, a convenient way to connect people looking for roommates, jobs, for goods to buy and goods to sell and more.

But like anything else, when it’s not tended to, the system is downgraded. It collapses into its own decay and demise. The rodents and the cockroaches (read: spammers) move in, build their nests and then there’s no getting rid of them.

With proper monitoring and proactive enforcement of positive policies, much of the cumulative garbage and crap were preventable. Not all of it, mind you, for a gargantuan task that was.

What craigslist powers that be failed to do through time was stand on the side of right.

When spammers moved in, they failed to walk the talk about flagging.

But that’s not the worst of it. Craigslist failed to side with the good folks — those of us who DO flag the shit ads. Those of us who DO post ads alerting users of ads from phishers and spammers.

Those walking and breathing viruses are always one step ahead. THEY flag these posts aimed at alerting others.

And craigslist goes right along, falling in step with those phishers and spammers who make it a daily practice to flag helpful alerts that craigslist then proceeds to delete.

What is the point then of the good folks posting warning ads?!

There is none. And that’s the point. Craigslist ISN’T monitoring. It’s asleep at the wheel. It doesn’t care or has stopped caring.

And the result is what we see today: Craigshitlist. They gave up the good fight. They gave it up for the cockroaches of life.