V is for Virgo — and vision boards

… because it is a new moon in Virgo … 28 degrees … technically at 1.30 am. Eastern time yesterday (Sept. 20) but new moon energies continue for about three days

… because new moons are a time to plant seeds, make wishes, envision desires and goals for the coming month {and thereabouts}

… because Virgo loves details! … order … organizing … making lists, if not actually then mentally

… because Virgo is a sign of healing and service and is an expert at cutting through the dross to reach the kernel of one’s truth and identify need

… because Virgo is uber-critical — to a fault — analytical — which can be perceived as cold, unemotional, overly rational – just-the-facts-ma’am

… because as far as new moons go, there’s possibly no better energy for defining personal desires, goals, needs … for essentially crafting a plan, inner road map …

or a vision board!

Everyone knows what a vision board is, no?

  • Get paper. Poster-size works well. Foam cores or poster papers with thickness are recommended since you’ll be gluing images and words.
  • Get materials. Magazines, printed matter. Thrift stores, libraries, freebies about town, hospitals, offices, stacks from friends/family, recycling bins. It’s amazing where you can source those throwaways! My YMCA, for example, gets a big variety of mags donated by members. Cool!
  • Get images off the Net. Before I begin vision boards, I often have themes in mind but lack the printed matter. For example, if I’m feelin’ waterfalls, I can’t count on local materials to provide options. The Net’s a GREAT source for what you can’t get your hands on.
  • Get scissors and glue. Experience teaches that sticky glue sticks provide less adhesion and workability than liquid glue with the precision tip. Glue sticks designed for mounting photos work great if you’re using photos you printed on photo paper off the Net.
  • Reflect. Envision. Dream!

Pore through your sources of images and words and cut out those that speak to you … that jiggle your heart … ignite a passion … or REMIND you of one long buried.

Only one stipulation with vision boards:

They speak to YOU — and FOR you.

The stuff that your parents or society or conventions tell you that you should be or should want or should have … that has no place on a vision board! Toss that stuff out with the scraps of paper from your cut-up magazines!

  • Play!

Take those images, pictures, words, letters that you cut out and play! Place them on your poster wherever feels right for you!

Some folks like tons of images and words overlapping.

Me, I like pictures and words set into their own spaces, singularly and independently. To each his own! Googling “vision boards” will produce a vast array of amazing examples and portrayals! And they’re so much fun to look at! The imagination knows no limits!

  • Creating a vision board is organic. Lively and prayerful. Sacred creativity. I often set the scene with candles, incense, music.

Vision boards can be done alone or in groups. Solo is my preference but there’s a lot to be said for a vision-boarding party! Women (I’ve yet to meet a male who does vision boards … not that they don’t exist!) bringing bunches of old magazines and supplies all gathered gettin’ all creative and havin’ fun.

Then when everyone’s done, everyone gathering in a circle and each woman taking her turn, holding up her board and sharing. It’s really special. Magical. Illuminating. Powerful.

  • Signing your board. Though not necessarily a common or oft-recommended practice,  it’s so important I feel. On the back I write a short prayer, a sacred message, and/or a symbol (i.e., the wiccan star) and the date.
  • Place the board where you can see it every day. This is key!

A vision board is a photograph of your consciousness. It is a living breathing creation. It is not to be shoved into a closet, folded and s;id under the bed!

Respect it. Gaze upon it. Glance at it as you pass through a room. Admire your work. Feed and nourish it with your attention. It’s like a plant. It needs you to water it! So take those moments every day to connect your heart and mind to your vision board!

  • Disposal. Now, I’ve done quite a lot of vision boards over time. I leave them up as long as they still resonate. When they no longer do, or it just feels time for a new one, I honor their passing.

Don’t simply toss it into the trash! You can burn it. Or soak it in water (a sink or tub) to unglue the images/words from their surface, then (and only then) everything can be tossed or recycled.

  • Begin anew upon another new moon.

One more thing on a personal note. My current living situation doesn’t lend itself to attaching things to walls … plus I’m rarely there.

My solution: I create mobile vision boards … in a spiral-bound sketch book! I have it open lying on the passenger seat in my car, where I spend a LOT of hours, particularly as a pizza-delivery driver! So my aspirations, goals, dreams travel with me — literally!

So that’s my story and I’m stickin’ to it! You can too! All it takes is inspiring images … words … scissors and glue! And you! Creating … playing … envisioning … planting seeds on a new moon for harvesting … in their time — and yours!






just when you thought it was safe to live

Picture a carousel.

The ride starts smooth, slow, in ease.

The rotation speed ramps up a little. Horses lift and fall faster. Stagecoach seats stay put but shake some.

Like a pilot in  a plane hitting turbulence, a carousel pilot announces over the PA system: “Sorry everyone. Just mechanical abnormalities. We’re working on balancing them out.”

He says so through his tobacco-stained teeth. Canine (cuspid) on the right’s missing. Upper lip in a whisper of a curl suggesting a tic, a sneer, a malformation from birth.

He shifts a black handle from 2 o’clock to 4 o’clock. Horses bob like yellow floats on a restless sea. Kiddies clutch silvery shiny poles. Parents watch nervously from the perimeter.

“Mommy! Mommy! Horsey’s going too fast!”

“It’s OK, honey,” mommy shouts when horsey swoooooshes past.

“The man’s trying to fix it!!” she shouts through cupped hands. Reassuring words that won’t reach her child’s ear in the whoooooooooooosh.

“I’m so sorry folks!” the pilot announces loudly over the din of wind and spin. “Seems to be an issue with the braking system. Our mechanics are working feverishly beneath the carousel to fix this right now. The kids are strapped onto the horses and carriages so they’re safe.”

There are no mechanics beneath the carousel. No mechanics period.

He glides the crank from 4 o’clock to 6 o’clock.

Random musings on (craft) beers

Writers like their drink. Ain’t that integral to the craft?

+ + +

There’s shame in being 60 and living with roommates — because you have to. Because finances, rent, local wages, job opportunities or lack thereof so dictate.

I am so ashamed, so deeply ashamed, of my life and what it has become, I can hardly breathe.

This isn’t how I envisioned my life at 60. Not that I envisioned it any particular way. I didn’t.

+ + +

Along the way of some truly terrible years (mostly starting in 2008-09 with Evildoer Obama’s takeover), I lost.

Just. Lost.

Can you ever get back the light, get back to Light, after Darkness, despair, desperation, destruction?

Don’t know.

Want to say yes. But I’d be lying. “Don’t know” is the honest answer.

+ + +

In a down mood all of a sudden. Is it the cloudy gray skies so reminiscent of the Pacific Northwest that nearly cost me my life?

Likely. Very likely.

I can’t breathe in the Gray.

I ought not post when I’m this down.

+ + +

Few if anyone reads this blog anyways. Enhances isolation. Feeds the Gray.

On the flip side, few if anyone reads this blog anyway. So I can write whatever the fuck I want and no one cares.

And isn’t that the backhanded gift of Isolation?

You’re not seen. Not heard. No one cares.

So doesn’t matter what you do, say, write. No one cares.

This I learned: in my family of origin.  Okay, mainly from she who gave me life.

Why the FUCK must we have mothers?!?!


He’s Little. He’s Loud. He’s a Liar.

I’ve encountered all variety of people.

From human angels to murderers and much between, I’ve engaged with a wide array of remarkable and memorable characters in my 60 years (and growing).

But a pathological liar was not on the list — not that I’m aware of — until recently.

Joe’s a regular Costco customer and a daily visitor at the food samplings, according to the food-demo gals.

He’s a short, middle-aged New York Jew. He has dark bushy thinning unkept hair, thick-framed spectacles and the self-centered, aggressive, know-it-all brashness characteristic of New Yorkers.

Joe enjoys a sport.

The sport of telling lies.

Fantastical lies that have no footing in reality. Lies that are easily disproved — if one takes the time to play detective and do the legwork.

Stationed at their stainless-steel rolling carts, Costco demo gals are a captive audience. A confined audience.

The type of audience perhaps that would satisfy a pathological liar.

I was made aware of Joe’s Policy of Lying last year when he told food-demo gal Maria that there’d been a big accident that morning. Some 7 cars on a major 2-lane thoroughfare, the sole road through the area.

When asked for details, Maria could provide none, saying only that she’d heard the news from Joe.

Inquisitive intelligent minds need to know — ‘specially when the news is that big, that impactful. So with Maria nearby, I investigated.

I googled it. I’m a superb, thorough researcher.

I checked the local paper online for late-breaking news and updates.

I called the police.

I checked the state’s Department of Transportation, which posts incidences, closures, etc.

Same result each effort. Zip. Zero. Nada. Not a shred of evidence about an accident.

My suspicions about Joe’s credibility soared.

As they did about Maria’s intelligence — for despite all evidence to the contrary — FROM AUTHORITIES WHO’D KNOW ABOUT ANY MULTIVEHICLE ACCIDENT — Maria persisted in believing Joe.

I can’t do stupid. That’s when I ended friendly ties with her.

And saw Joe for who he is. A fibber.

A man who makes sport of telling lies, some outrageous — like the massive accident — others simple — like an inch of snow has just fallen or it’s raining — when it’s bone dry and clear.

It’s no skin off my teeth, his lying.

Plus I’m not easily scammed — not by a long shot! I’m proud to write that in my 60 years, I’ve never had the wool pulled over my eyes, though once someone came close.

I’ve disproved Joe’s lies numerous times. He doesn’t care. Clearly he’s about grandiosity, not skillfully covering his tracks, which makes him a pathetic liar, or a lazy one, or both.


It’s not for me I’m concerned when he circulates his lies.  It’s the others, the food-demo gals, the Costco customers.

They believe him. Why shouldn’t they? On the outside, he appears normal.

They see a frequent Costco customer and daily visitor at the food demos.

They a man named Joe. They see a middle-aged, short, loud New York Jew with dark-rimmed spectacles and a proclivity for proclaiming.

They don’t see the pathological liar. The man with an incessant and probably compulsive need to devise and circulate fibs.

This is frightening.

More frightening, however, is how he tells them. Completely straight-faced. Dead serious. Not a quiver in the voice or twitch in the eye.

He proclaims his falsehoods as matter-of-factly as you reciting your address for a tax form at the workplace.

Joe’s dangerous — not as much for the content of his lies but his believability.

But he doesn’t fool me. He can’t.

He’s been found out. Spirit and karma will take care of it.

Now that he’s found out, if I’m chatting with a food-demo gal and Joe appears, he’ll vomit some lie about how it’s raining or snowing or whatever.

He’s a waste of my time and I waste no time leaving immediately.

However, like a cat with a mouse, I may play it differently next time he proclaims a lie for us all.

Saaaaay, he announces it’s raining.

“Rain?!” I exclaim.

“Why, that’s hardly rain! That’s a monsoon! Watch out for the cats ‘n’ poodles!”

Just to see what a liar does when given a spoonful of his own medicine. His own psychotic pathetic poison.

His response, one can’t predict.

But this much is certain: You can play in humor. Make light of a darkness — a darkness that is not yours and is not yours to fix.

That, my personal lifelong lesson, continues …




May Day. When it was real.

I remember May Day when it was real. Before technology. Before smartphones. Before emails, texts and all cyberspace deliveries without warmth, heart or time invested by the sender.

It wasn’t happy.

In fact, it was rife with abuse, rejection, abandonment, the toxic war zone that is my childhood.

Perhaps this is why I cling to fond memories, holding fast and dearly to remind myself it wasn’t all bad all of the time.

One memory pokes its head through the hard dry soil May 1 of every year.

We lived on a hill, my original family of four, with some 15 neighbors. The half acre demanded heavy toil and slave labor; rather, to be fair, was my father’s demand.

But that’s another post.

The acreage included large sloping hillsides of weeds, snails, ivy and geraniums  in red, pink and yellow (if memory serves).

Flowers-wise, my mother tended to a small rectangle of rosebushes at the side of the house. Roses were few; don’t even recall any plucked from the scraggly bushes ever in the house!

Geraniums, however, we had in spades.

Every May Day, my mother clipped geraniums from the yard. That is, I presume they were geraniums given a dearth of roses and other flowers.

From white paper and tape, she fashioned cones. Into each she placed a small bouquet of flowers.

Simple. Nothing fancy, elaborate or over the top.

Then my younger sister (by two years) and I delivered the May Day bouquets to the neighbors on the hill.

I don’t recall how we delivered bouquets to those who weren’t at home. Did the cones have strings or paper handles for knobs? Or did we simply lay them aside the door? Or bring them back?

Those who were home expressed surprise and delight at their deliveries.

May Day is a day when my mother shined.

In the Darkness, harshness, squelching and violence that was the home, it was on May 1 that her thoughtfulness, sentimentality, eye for color, love of flowers and whimsy shined.


I’m glad she expressed those. For me.

Above all, I’m glad for her.

May Day is a day she was able to express herself, to be free and childlike, creating beauties, simply.

And isn’t it the simplest that touch us the most, that we remember the most?

For these traits, I remember well and thank you, mom (there on the other side).

Happy May Day.

These are for you.


Happy May Day

for a horse {i knew but in passing}

T’was the local headline, certainly, that caught my attention.

“Bee swarm attacks people, horses, dogs”

And the lead:

“Two women, four horses and two dogs were attacked by swarming bees Thursday, April 27, at a home in {this) block of {X-road}.

It’s a grisly story.

A 70-year-old resident and her neighbor were covered by hundreds of aggressive bees on their faces and heads.

Ten firefighters, three in protective gear, were able to pull the women away from the swarm.

They were rushed to a hospital, which fortunately was very nearby, and are reported in stable condition.


I’m glad for them.

Not all the animals were as lucky.

The two dogs, one of whom ran away and was later captured, survived.

I’m glad for them.

The two horses were in critical condition and taken to a large-animal vet.

One horse, sadly, did not make it.

As I said, the story is grisly.

But what compels me to share is the location: about a minute’s drive from a recent former residence.

I remember the fenced land alongside the country-ish road where the horses spent their time.

I know exactly where this happened, can picture it as if it were yesterday.

In my love for animals, sometimes I’d say hello to the horses as I passed by, which was daily. Or give a small wave. Or simply quietly appreciate and respect them.

The horses always brought a smile, if not to my face then inside.

Their presence brought joy.

I never met their owners but if I had, I’d have told them what beautiful creatures they are, the horses, and how much I enjoyed them from the seat of my Subaru.

Now one of the horses is gone. I feel quite sad. Though I knew not the horse by name  (and, to be honest, I’m now relieved I didn’t), I remember his/her presence.

It cannot be forgotten.

Beautiful horse, I’m sorry you went in such a terrible manner.

Rest in peace. Be in freedom.

Pedals — and Petals — Power

I’m in a blue mood.

Would rather feel in the pink. Haha, no wordplay intended. You’ll get the humor in a moment.

Was searching for today’s perfect moment and couldn’t find one. Not that one isn’t there. The inability to spot one speaks more to my blue mood than its absence.

Then I flashed back to this finding in front of a Safeway supermarket.

Some brave soul rides around on this! Congrats to her! I presume it’s a female for reasons that’ll come clear.

“This’ll make a today’s perfect moment,” I thought when I pulled out the cell phone camera. Three days ago.

I didn’t use it then so “today’s perfect moment” isn’t, technically.

That’s OK, I suppose. Anything that lifts you from a blue mood to put you into the pink has gotta be good.


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