There’s an alarm clock. Then there’s sheer alarm.

Some days are best begun with a coffee — and a cocktail.

Like today.

An unknown man barged into my room about 8:30 this morning. I was dead asleep — finally! — after insomnia.

Room’s pitch-black.

Suddenly my door swings open. I jolt awake. Through sleepy hazy head and eyes make out a figure lit from behind by daylight. Male, strapping, tall, a beard.

“I didn’t know anyone was home,” he says.

“I am.” {alone in the house}

“I’m the termite inspector,” he says.

“Oh,” I mumble, relieved. Fumble for my phone. 8:40 a.m.

“I was told you were coming between 10 and noon.”

“I came early.”

“I can see that” — I say to myself.

“Do you need to get in here?” I ask.

“No. I’ve already done the inspections outside.”

Great. He shuts my door and leaves.

In short, I was given wrong information due to a communication breakdown between realtor and various inspectors and landlord.

Realtors treat renters in homes for sale like we’re an obstacle. A problem. A person to be disregarded, shoved aside, a nuisance, rendered invisible in the pursuit of a sale and payout.

Oh have I got stories from 9 months of a house for sale.

Point is: NO WOMAN LIKES BEING AWAKENED BY A STRANGE MAN STANDING AT THE THRESHOLD OF THE BEDROOM DOOR.

Instinct prevails. Senses of safety, threat, danger, survival.

Females are vulnerable in ways that males aren’t. All these raw biologically-wired neurons fire in a split second upon perceived or impending threat.

They skyrocket when moving from state of deep sleep into abrupt awake.

Leslie the realtor, as source of failed communication, bears full responsibility for this scenario. A female no less! You’d think she’d know better. But then, her eye’s on dollar signs.

So I had my morning coffee.

Followed by a rye whiskey with (diet) soda.

Because a big strange man suddenly opening my bedroom door  while I’m sleeping is instinctually and deeply unsettling.

There’s an alarm clock. Then there’s sheer alarm.

This one is on you, Leslie.

The cocktail is on me.

 

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