Where there’s smoke, there’s me?!

To my sensibilities, ain’t nuthin’ better than an icy drink and a smoke outdoors on a warm evening.

One thing that people are consistently surprised by through the decades is hearing I smoke. Except I don’t. Well, sort of.

I’m a natural smoker.

Meaning: there’s no addiction whatsoever. Most of the year, I don’t think about tobacco. Don’t have any. Don’t want or need any. Don’t miss it. Especially in winter. My body’s immunity says “eh-eh. No.”

Come summer, health turns robust. Thoughts turn to hanging outdoors during warm evenings … frosty beer or cocktail. Were I in the South, I’d be swinging in that proverbial porch swing with a mint julep in one hand, a smoke in the other.

Here’s the deal. I love to roll my own with the 100% tobacco. The prepackaged stuff is shit. Full of chemicals that’ll kill ya.

And I’ve bought those bags of 100% natural tobacco and rolling papers.

Problem is,  I live in Arizona. Dry dry dry! That bagged loose tobacco gets REAL dry and REAL unrollable REAL fast!

And since when I smoke, I generally want only one or two, the bagged tobacco gets bone-dry bad so fast that it gets tossed. 😦

Forcing a compromise.

I buy Smokin’ Joes. They’re cheap — at least lots cheaper than the known brands, including American Spirit — and a pack’ll survive the heat and last through my slow smoking pace.

Bought a new pack today. Been out on the porch a coupla hours. Two-and-a-half smokes in and I’m satisfied.

That speaks to this lovely evening. About 75 degrees at 9 at night. Second White Claw (low-carb) beer to my left. Bowl-turned-ashtray to my right. Butt seated on front-porch wooden planks. Sprinkler dousing a small lawn thirsting for water in the drought. Crickets chirping. Alone.

It gets no better than this! In fact, this scene makes my Top 5 List of Ways I’d Like to Die. I won’t reveal what my Top Choice is.

But a satisfying smoke or two and chilled drink and cricket song on a front porch on a warm peaceful night … I ain’t got nuthin’ to bitch about.

Can’t predict the next hankering for that smoke. Only that it’ll be at the right time, in the right place and satisfying as all get out. Keepin’ it pleasurable. Keepin’ it real.






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